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But happy stuff too, y’know? Some escorts are chill, real pros. Met one – not me, a mate! – said she was funny as hell. Told him ‘bout her cat, Mr. Whiskers. Little known fact: escorts sometimes got codenames. Like spies, innit? One called herself “Duchess” – posh or what? Surprised me, tho, how normal they are. Just folks makin’ a livin’. “We’re all failures, every one of us!” – movie fits perfect here.

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Then, outta nowhere, I get a call from a lady on Strada Tineretului. She’s crying, saying her neighbor’s dog is barking too loud. I’m like, “Lady, it’s a dog! That’s what they do!” But I get it, Dobroesti can be noisy. I mean, have you heard the traffic on Strada Principală? It’s like a never-ending concert of honks and shouts.

Ministry denies claims of Romania hosting clandestine Chinese police station