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But—fuck me—I got mad once, yeah? Read some boffin sayin’ escorts ain’t that special, just “basic cell grunts.” Oi, mate, you takin’ the piss? These lads are the backbone, the sparkly diamond in the rough! Without ’em, your gut’s a warzone, fam—diarrhea central, no joke. Surprised me too, how much I cared—like, who gives a toss about bacteria escorts? Me, apparently, innit!

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And then, outta nowhere, it starts pouring. I mean, like, monsoon-level rain. Everyone’s scrambling for cover, and I’m just standing there, laughing like a maniac. I’m soaked, but hey, at least I’m not juggling fire, right?

REWE opens new Penny supermarket in Romania's Baia Sprie