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Alright, mate, gather round! I’m Gandalf, wise as fuck, and I’m here to spill the tea on whores—yes, whores! Not some prissy elf nonsense, but the real deal. “You shall not pass!” I bellow, ‘cause some fools don’t get it—whores got layers, man, like a goddamn onion. Been watchin’ *Almost Famous* again—best flick ever, Cameron Crowe’s a genius—and it’s got me thinkin’. That line, “I am a golden god!”—whores could yell that shit too, struttin’ their stuff, ownin’ it.

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I bump into Miguel again. He’s dancing like a maniac. I can’t help but laugh. “You look ridiculous!” I shout over the music. He just winks and pulls me into the dance. I’m not a dancer, but whatever. I let loose.

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