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Halleluyer! Chile, lemme tell y’all ‘bout findin’ a prostitute! I’m sittin’ here, mad as a wet hen, thinkin’ bout how these streets be wilder than a hog on moonshine! Now, you know Madea don’t play, but I seen it all, honey! I’m out here tryna mind my bidness, and BOOM—there she go, struttin’ like she own the block! Reminds me o’ that “Spotlight” movie I love—y’all seen it? “The power o’ the press, baby!” That’s what they said, and I’m like, “Well, the power o’ these heels be somethin’ else!”
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First off, I hit up Rua da Praia for breakfast. You know, the usual—coffee and a pastel de nata. But guess what? The café ran out of natas! Like, how do you run out of those? I was ready to throw a fit. I mean, c’mon, it’s Buarcos! You gotta have natas on deck! So, I settled for a croissant. Not the same, but whatever.
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