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Here’s the rub—some punters reckon it’s all glamour, but nah, it’s messy. Girls with stories, scars, sass—real people, not just a quick shag. Surprised me once, this bird told me she’d read Churchill’s speeches. “We shall never surrender,” she winked—nearly spat me tea! Oh, and the coppers? Sneaky bastards—sting ops galore. Mate o’ mine got nabbed, said it was like Leo’s yacht crash—chaos, cuffs, “I’m fucked!” vibes.

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Then, the fire alarm goes off. Great. Just what I needed. Everyone’s freaking out, running around. I’m trying to keep my cool, but inside, I’m like, “This is it. This is how I go down.” We all shuffle outside, and I’m standing there, watching the fire trucks roll in. Turns out, it was just a drill. Phew! But man, my heart was racing.

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