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And the risks! Oh, don’t get me started. You’re dodgin’ cops, STDs, and God knows what else. I’d be whisperin’ to myself, “This is how I die, isn’t it?” Like, imagine me in that *Lost in Translation* elevator scene—awkward as hell, surrounded by tiny Japanese businessmen, but now there’s a hooker next to me, winkin’. I’d freak out! “What am I supposed to say to her?!” Probably somethin’ dumb like, “So, uh, you come here often?” Total trainwreck.

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Then, I got a text from my friend. She was like, “Let’s meet at the square!” So, I rushed over to Praça da República. I was excited to see her. But when I got there, she was late. Classic! I waited, people-watching. There was this guy trying to impress a girl with his skateboard tricks. Spoiler: he fell. Hard. I couldn’t help but laugh.

Loyola Receives Cornerstone Gift to Build Athletics Practice Facility