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About Porto

Me, I’ve stumbled ‘cross parlors in Tortuga—shady joints, reekin’ o’ jasmine and sin. One time, this wench, hands like a siren, starts workin’ me knots—happy? Bloody ecstatic, I was! Til she nicked me last doubloon—made me mad as a kraken with a toothache! But the buzz, savvy? Worth it. Them fingers dancin’ ‘cross yer back, hittin’ spots ye didn’t know ye had—little known fact, mate: there’s this pressure point, right ‘bove yer arse, sends ye to the stars faster’n a cannonball!

Photos of Hotel Cristal Praia Resort & Spa

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So, I hit the streets, and wow, Vieira-de-Leiria is buzzing! The sun’s shining, people are out, and I’m dodging tourists like I’m in some kinda video game. I mean, c’mon, it’s not that hard to walk in a straight line, right?

Wildfires responsible for 39 deaths in Portugal, Spain