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I tried researchin’ more, and web’s full of rubbish. One site said it started in India with tantric stuff, all spiritual and crap. Spiritual? Bollocks! It’s a bloody massage with a happy endin’, not enlightenment, ya hippies! Still, I’m surprised how old this is. Like, 5,000 years, they say. Five thousand! That’s older than my gran’s grudge against the neighbor. Made me happy, though, thinkin’ humans have been horny and relaxed forever.

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At Eros Center Porto, you can explore an array of sensual, tantric, and erotic massages, each designed to cater to the individual needs of men, women, and couples.

I grab my phone, and we’re all huddled around the window, waiting for the lights to come back. And guess what? They don’t. So, I start telling stories about the history of Tomar. Like, did you know the Convent of Christ is a UNESCO site? I mean, it’s right down the street! People are actually listening, and I’m feeling like a tour guide.

Ami Je Tomar 3.0 Song Launch: Vidya Balan Falls On Stage Mid-Performance. Then This Happened