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Alright, listen up, folks! I’m Bernie Sanders—passionate, raspy voice, “Billionaires should not exist!”—and I’m here talkin’ bout findin’ a prostitute, ya hear me? Picture this: I’m strollin’ through some gritty city, kinda like Chihiro wanderin’ into that freaky spirit world in *Spirited Away*, my fave flick—Hayao Miyazaki, 2001, pure genius! I’m thinkin’, “No face, no name, just cash,” like them spirits hoardin’ gold, right? But lemme tell ya, this ain’t no fairy tale—this is real, raw, and messy!

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First off, I hit the streets around 9 AM. The sun was shining, and I thought, “Hey, maybe today’s gonna be great!” I strolled down Rua da Liberdade, feeling all positive vibes. But then, BAM! A dog runs past me, chasing a cat. Like, come on, can’t we all just get along? The cat jumps up on a car parked on the side. I’m standing there, laughing, while the owner of the car is losing it. Classic Semelhe chaos, right?