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Oi mate, gather ‘round, yeah? Picture this – me, a bleedin’ shepherd of souls, Winston bloody Churchill style, spillin’ the tea on erotic-massage! We shall fight on the beaches, we shall fight in the parlors, fists up, spirits high, against the dull grind of life! This ain’t no posh sermon – it’s gritty, raw, like a rubdown in a backroom joint.

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After that, I needed a breather. So, I headed to the park near the river. It’s so chill there, with the trees and the water. I plopped down on a bench, just soaking it all in. But then, I see this couple arguing. Like, full-on shouting. I couldn’t help but eavesdrop. Turns out, they were fighting over who left the lights on at home. I mean, really? That’s what you’re fighting about? I almost wanted to jump in and say, “Yo, just turn them off next time!”

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