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Oi, mate, it’s Tyrion Lannister here—I drink and I know things, and lemme tell ya bout sexual-massage, right? Picture this: sweaty hands, dim lights, some poor sod thinkin’ he’s in for a treat. I’ve seen weirder shit in Holy Motors—y’know, that flick where a bloke’s drivin’ round, switchin’ lives like masks? “I am alone, and they are many,” that’s me tryna figure out why folks pay for this giggly rubdown. Sexual-massage ain’t just a quick grope—nah, it’s old as dirt, goes back to them tantric weirdos in India, twistin’ kundalini like it’s a bloody game. Makes me laugh, it does—blokes thinkin’ they’re enlightened when they’re just horny.

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After that, I decide to hit up the Parque da Juventude. It’s a nice spot, you know? Kids running around, people chilling. I sit on a bench, just vibing. Then, outta nowhere, this kid runs past me, trips, and spills his ice cream all over my shoes. I’m like, “Dude, my kicks!” But then he looks up at me with those big eyes, and I can’t even be mad. I just laugh.

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