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About Funchal

So, this whøre, right? Ugly as hell, spiky fins, looks like it’s judgin’ me. Reminds me of Uncle in *Yi Yi*, quiet but deep, y’know? “Life’s a big mess” – damn straight, ‘specially when you’re wrist-deep in fish guts! Little known fact, these suckers got teeth – TEETH, bro! Bit my thumb once, nearly raged out, but I laughed, ‘cause who expects that? Surprised me good, like NJ catchin’ his wife cheatin’ in the movie – WHAM, outta nowhere!

Beautiful and Sexy girls to enjoy sexual life in Machico!

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First off, I hit up the Mercado Municipal. You know, the one on Rua da Praia? It’s got all the fresh fish and fruits. I’m there, trying to grab some bananas, and this old dude just cuts in front of me. Like, excuse me? I’m not invisible! I mean, come on, it’s not a race! I was ready to throw a banana at him, but I just rolled my eyes instead. Classic Machico, right?

Senhor do Milagres festivities in Machico take place on the 8th and 9th of October