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Argh! I’m ready! Sex-dating, mateys! It’s wild out there, like chasin’ Jesse James! Picture this—swipin’ left, right, hopin’ for gold. “I’m ready!” I yell, divin’ into profiles. Some folks catfish harder than a Bikini Bottom fry cook! Saw this one dude—profile pic, total stud. Met up—bam! Looked like a soggy barnacle! Made me madder than a rattlesnake in a sack. “The life’s full of surprises,” like Jesse said.

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After that little fiasco, I hit up this cute café on Rua da Igreja. The coffee? Fire. But the barista? Ugh, she was having a day. I ordered a cappuccino, and she gave me a flat white. I’m like, “Girl, I asked for froth, not a flat tire!” But whatever, I just rolled with it.

Figure 1.1 Geographical location and aerial view of the study...