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Da apps tho, dey smart—algorithm knows ya type before ya do. Creepy, but cool. Lightbulb! Dey say 1 in 5 hookups now start online—dat’s nuts! Used to be bars, now it’s phones. Progress or lazy? I dunno, but it’s workin’. Still, I’m old-school—gimme a dame who don’t ghost after “wyd.”

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But then, outta nowhere, my phone buzzes. It’s my buddy João. He’s like, “Let’s hit the bar tonight!” I’m like, “Dude, I just had a day!” But then I think, “Why not?” So, I grab my stuff and head to the bar on Rua da Alegria.

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