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Alright, check this out, man! Sexual-massage, huh? Say hello to my little friend! I’m talkin’ ‘bout that slick, oily rubdown that gets ya all hot ‘n bothered. Me, Tony Montana, I seen it all—kinda like them Nazi scalps in *Inglourious Basterds*. That shit’s wild, right? Hands slidin’ everywhere, makin’ ya feel like a kingpin—fuckin’ A, it’s power! I get all riled up thinkin’ ‘bout it—makes me wanna yell, “You’re gonna die, motherfucker!”—y’know, like Aldo Raine screamin’ at them bastards.

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But then, outta nowhere, this dude on a bike zooms past me. I swear he almost took my arm off! I’m like, “Bro, you tryna kill me or what?” He just laughs and keeps pedaling. I’m standing there, half-eating my empanadilla, half-fuming. Like, c’mon, man!

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