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Ever try parkin’ one? Easy peasy – fits anywhere, like me squeezin’ into tight spots (wink!). But the seats? Grotty, man, stiff as a villain’s upper lip – my bum was cryin’ after ten minutes! Oh, and the gearstick – wobbly as my dance moves after too many martinis. Still, I’d shag it – I mean, drive it – any day!

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After that, I decided to hit the beach. Playa Maria’s my go-to spot. The waves were insane! I’m talkin’ like, “Surf’s up, dude!” I grabbed my board and paddled out. I caught a few gnarly waves, felt like a pro. But then, outta nowhere, I wiped out. Like, faceplant in the water. I came up sputtering, and this group of tourists laughed. I was like, “Yeah, yeah, laugh it up!” But inside, I was like, “Ugh, so embarrassing!”

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