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I spot this one gal, all sass, leanin on a lamppost. She’s givin me the eye, like she’s Adèle in that movie, whisperin, “You’re the most beautiful thing I’ve seen.” I’m thinkin, “Hulkster, don’t fall for it!” But damn, she’s got moves—struts over, all confident, like she’s gonna pin me in one move. I’m laughin, brother, cause it’s a hustle, but it’s art too, ya dig?

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So, I drive over, and let me tell ya, the traffic is a nightmare. I’m stuck behind this old lady who’s going 10 mph. I’m like, “C’mon, lady! We ain’t in a funeral procession!” Finally, I get to the address, and it’s this rundown house. Looks like it’s been through a hurricane or two. I knock, and this guy opens the door, looking like he just rolled outta bed. He’s all, “What do you want?” I’m like, “Dude, I’m here to investigate your claim.” He just stares at me like I’m speaking Martian.

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