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So, listen, mate – raspy hiss – it’s hands rubbin’, oil drippin’, all sensual-like, yeah? Supposed to relax ya, but me? I’m thinkin’, “Is this allowed, precious?” Some bloke in Thailand told me once, “It’s ancient, mate, been ‘round since emperors got frisky!” True story – them old kings had whole rooms for it, candles flickerin’, girls gigglin’. Made me laugh, picturin’ some fat king goin’, “More oil, peasants!” – raspy cackle.

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After that, I’m just ready to go home. But no, I gotta swing by the hardware store on Calle de la Libertad. I’m in there, and it’s packed. I’m trying to grab some supplies, but it’s like a game of dodgeball. I’m bumping into people, and I’m like, “Excuse me, sorry, my bad!”

Sartorius Stedim Biotech plant in Puerto Rico receives LEED Platinum certification