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About Bayamon

But then—anger! These shady parlors, “happy ending” crap, givin’ it a bad rap. Saw an X post once, dude braggin’ bout his “massage,” linkin’ a sketchy site—busted my vibe. “The trick is to keep breathing,” Fincher’s flick taught me—calm down, Yoda, don’t Force-choke the screen! Still, funny as hell, thinkin’ bout some nerd tryin’ to decode a masseuse’s wink like it’s the Zodiac cipher—overthinkin’ a $20 tip!

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First off, I hit up Calle 1. You know, the one with all the food trucks? I was like, “Yo, I need some breakfast!” Got me a pastelón that was bigger than my head. Seriously, I thought I was gonna need a forklift to carry it. But man, it was delish!

Ruins of Lazaretto de Isla de Cabras