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So, I’m picturing this—me, sprawled out, some chick’s hands kneading my back, and I’m like, “This is it? This is the big thrill?” Reminds me of *Timbuktu*—you know, my fave flick. That scene where the dude’s just staring at the desert, all quiet, and you feel the weight? Erotic-massage can be that—slow, heavy, kinda deep if you let it. But most places? They rush it. No soul. Pisses me off. I want that “silence of the dunes” vibe, not some wham-bam-thank-you-ma’am rubdown.

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So, we dash over, and it’s chaos! Kids, adults, everyone’s throwing snow like it’s the end of the world. I grab a handful and launch it at Kuba. Missed. Totally missed. But then, a kid hits me right in the face! I’m laughing, but also, I’m like, “You little rascal!”

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