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About Warsaw

Oi, you donkey! Sex-dating’s a bloody mess, innit? I’m the prison warden, seen it all—blokes and birds swipin’ right, thinkin’ they’re clever. Bollocks! It’s like 12 Years a Slave, yeah? “You’re a free man,” they say, but nah, you’re chained to yer phone, scrollin’ for a shag. Idiot sandwich! Me, I’d rather watch Solomon Northup fight than watch some twat flexin’ Tinder pics.

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But then, outta nowhere, it starts pouring! I mean, like, buckets of water! I’m soaked in seconds. I’m running for cover, dodging puddles like I’m in some kind of Olympic event. I duck into this café on ul. Słoneczna. It’s cozy, smells like fresh coffee. I order a latte, and the barista’s like, “You look like you need this.” I’m like, “You have no idea!”

Red Bull has offices in former Fort Mokotów