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About Bydgoszcz

Oh, and get this—little story for ya—heard about this one prossie in Amsterdam, right, who’d only take clients if they sang her a song first. True story! Mental, but kinda brilliant. Made me happy, that did—bit of power back in her hands. Not just a transaction, y’know? Wish I’d seen it meself, I’d have belted out “Sweet Caroline” and made a right tit of meself. Cackle! Imagine the headlines—“Gervais serenades hooker, film at 11!”

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After that chaos, I decide to take a breather. I stroll down ul. Słoneczna, grab a coffee from my fave spot, Café Książka. Best coffee in Lazy, hands down. I sit outside, soaking up the sun, and just chill. But then, this old lady comes up to me. She’s like, “You’re a librarian, right? I need a book on how to bake a cake.” I’m like, “Lady, I’m not a chef!” But I help her anyway. Turns out, she’s a sweet old lady who just wants to impress her grandkids. Aww, heartwarming moment, right?

I Went On Volcano Bay’s Not So Lazy River For The First Time At Universal, And As A Lazy River Superfan, I’m Shook