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Anyways, I’d probly suck at this. “Call it, friendo,” I’d say to some lady, tryin’ to sound cool. She’d just stare, like, “What’s this fat guy on about?” I’d be all nervous, thinkin’, “Homer, you idiot, this ain’t Springfield!” But then – whoa! – one time I saw this chick with a tattoo of a donut on her arm. “Mmm… donuts.” Nearly asked her out just for that!

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But back to fishing. I finally get a bite! I’m reelin’ it in, heart racin’. It’s a decent-sized perch. I’m feelin’ like a champ. But then, the dude from Wrocław catches a pike. A freakin’ pike! I’m like, “Seriously?!”

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