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So I walk, streets dirty, smell like goat ass, but I see her—prostitute! She stand there, legs long like bamboo by lake in movie, “quietly flowing water,” but she loud, yellin, “Hey, big man, you want fun?” I laugh, heart go boom-boom, very excite! In Kazakhstan, we got girls, but this one? She pro, she know tricks. Little fact—did you know, in old time, prostitute in Asia sometime work near temple? Like movie, holy and dirty mix together, crazy, yes?

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Man, what a day! I swear, being a cashier in Chrzanów is like riding a rollercoaster with no seatbelt. So, I roll into work at the local Biedronka, right? It’s on ul. Krakowska, and lemme tell ya, it was packed. Like, people were practically fighting over the last pack of toilet paper. Seriously, who hoards that stuff?

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