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About Krakow

But – hold on. Sometimes? It’s a MESS. Oil everywhere. Once – this chick – mid-massage – slips OFF the table! BAM. Floor. I’m laughin’ – she’s PISSED. “Asshole!” she yells. I’m like – “Baby, I’m Christopher FUCKIN’ Walken!” – nah, I didn’t say that. Thought it tho. Made me happy – chaos! Like – Aronofsky’s junkies. Messy. Real. “We got a WINNER here!” – that’s me, screamin’ inside.

Then, I bumped into my buddy, Tomek. He’s always got the craziest stories. He told me about this wild party last weekend. Apparently, someone tried to DJ with a potato. A potato! I mean, how does that even work? We laughed so hard, I almost spilled my cappuccino.