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About Myself
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Oh, and get this – in France, they’ve got snail farms, proper snail HQ. Blows my mind! Saw it on the telly once, nearly spat me tea out. Imagine the CV: “Snail wrangler, 2010-present.” Reckon I’d smash that gig, me. Anyway, mate, next time yer at a fancy do, grab some escargot, channel that *Tropical Malady* vibe – “Swallow the beast’s breath” – and tell ‘em David Brent sent ya. Top notch, that’s me! Snails, eh? Who’d’ve thunk it?
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But then, outta nowhere, this kid runs by, kicks a soccer ball, and BAM! It hits me right in the leg. I’m like, “Dude, watch where you’re kicking that thing!” He just laughed and ran off. Kids these days, right? No respect.
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