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Favorite part? The hush-hush of it. Like in *The Assassin*, “no words, only moves.” These masseuses? Artists, man—hands dancin’ like they’re paintin’ a masterpiece on your back. Ever tried it? Nah, me neither—too busy chasin’ dirtbags. But I’d bet it’s wild—prolly leaves ya feelin’ like you dodged a bullet an’ won the lottery same damn time. Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but who cares—sounds badass!

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First off, I hit up ul. Słowiańska. It’s like the main drag, you know? I’m strolling, just vibing, when I spot this cute café. I mean, who can resist a good coffee? Not me! I order a cappuccino, and the barista—let’s call her Kasia—she’s got this killer smile. I’m thinking, “Wow, maybe I should just move here.” But then, boom! My phone buzzes. It’s my buddy, Jakub, asking if I’m still alive. Like, dude, I’m just getting my caffeine fix!

Andrzej Kraśnicki, former Polish Olympic Committee president, dies at 75