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Sometiems I wonder—am I too old for this? Nah, screw that! Sexual-massage ain’t just for young punks—it’s for anyone with a pulse! Surprised me how it’s all legal in some spots—Vegas, baby! Had a chick tell me once, “it’s therapy, not dirty”—yeah, right, lady, therapy with a happy ending! D’oh! Still, she wasn’t wrong—relaxes ya, but also, damn, gets the blood pumpin’!

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So, I’m walking along the river, and I see this group of kids playing soccer. They were all over the place, kicking the ball like it was the World Cup. I got a bit nostalgic, you know? Reminded me of my childhood. But then, one of them kicked the ball right at me! I dodged it like a ninja, but I was like, “Hey, watch it, kid!” They just laughed. Kids these days, right?

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