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About Palmerston North

Sexual-massage ain’t just rubbin’—it’s connection, it’s heat, it’s life! I get fired up thinkin’ bout it—those greedy fat cats hoardin’ wealth while folks can’t even afford a $20 massage? Makes my blood boil! “Billionaires should not exist!”—they’d outlaw this stuff if it didn’t pad their pockets. But lemme tell ya, this ain’t new—ancient Greeks were all over it, callin’ it “bodywork” to dodge the prudes. Little known fact: Hippocrates, yeah, the doctor guy, prescribed massages with a sexy twist for “hysteria”—wild, right?

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First off, I hit up the local café on Wairau Rd. Best flat whites in town, no cap. I’m standing there, waiting for my caffeine fix, and this dude in front of me orders a “decaf soy latte with extra foam.” Like, bro, who even drinks decaf? I almost lost it. But whatever, I’m not here to judge. I just need my coffee.

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