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Then there’s the good bits, oh yes. Met this one gal, swear she glowed like WALL-E’s Eva, all sparkly n’ that. She told me – get this – she once had a client pay her in rare coins. COINS, mate! Like pirate treasure! I was gobsmacked, couldn’t believe it. “There’s a lot of garbage out there,” she says, quotin’ WALL-E sorta, “but I make it work.” Proper legend, her. Made me happy, that did – seein’ someone thrive in the muck.

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Man, what a day! I swear, being a ratcatcher in Naenae is like being in a freakin’ action movie. So, I wake up, right? Sun’s barely up, and I’m already thinking about the rats. Ugh, those little furballs. Anyway, I grab my gear—trap, bait, gloves, the whole shebang—and head out.

28-year-old in court, charged with murder in Naenae street