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About Groningen

So – check this. I’m babysittin’ – years back. Kid’s asleep. I’m bored. Flip on some late-night cable. There’s this documentary – sketchy stuff. Sexual-massage parlors in Taipei. Hidden joints – real underground. They’re rubbin’ – but it’s more. Little known fact? In Asia – centuries old. They called it “tuina” – or somethin’. Meant healin’ – not just sexy vibes. Blew my mind! History in those hands – crazy!

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I’m standing there, just minding my own business, when this dude comes up. He’s got a wild look in his eyes, like he just ran a marathon or something. Turns out, he’s lost his wallet. I mean, c’mon man! You can’t be that careless. I’m like, “Dude, you gotta keep track of your stuff!” But he’s all frantic, saying he had cash for drinks. I’m like, “Bro, I can’t let you in without ID.”

On the Sauce at Hoppers: Sri Lankan dreams, St Pancras-style