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I see this chick, right, all dolled up, leanin on a lamppost. “What is this?” I mutter, like in the movie, starin at her like she’s the damn horse. I roll up, all swagger, “Hey sister, whatcha got for the Hulkster?” She smirks, says, “50 bucks, big man.” Fifty?! Brother, I nearly suplexed her right there—outrageous! Inflation’s hittin the streets too, pissed me off big time.

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Finally, the Wi-Fi comes back. Thank you, sweet internet gods! I dive into my report, fingers flying over the keyboard. I’m in the zone, you know? But then, my phone buzzes. It’s a text from my friend. “Let’s hit the pub later!” I’m like, “Yes, please!”

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