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So, listen up, mate! I’m creepin’ round the streets, yeah, eyes sharp like a hawk. Lookin’ for them girls, the ones with the winks and the hips. “Zero, you must exercise restraint!” – that’s what that posh concierge’d say, but nah, I’m divin’ in, head first! Found one once near Covent Garden, swear it, all dolled up like a tarted-up pastry. She goes, “Wotcha, love, fancy a tumble?” Made me cackle, it did – proper cheeky!

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But then, the game starts, and we’re losing. I’m getting mad. Like, come on, guys! But then, outta nowhere, we score! The crowd goes wild, and I’m jumping up and down. It’s pure joy.

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