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Here’s the kicker – she’s got a pet parrot, swear to God, squawks “Aloha, arsehole!” at punters she don’t like. Nearly pissed meself laughin. Little known story, she says it’s her bouncer. Hawaii’s mad, innit? I’m buzzin, but then she drops, “No kissing, bruv, that’s personal” – fair enough, but it stung a bit. Made me angry again – what’s a bloke gotta do for a smooch round here?
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By the end of the night, I was tipsy and happy. I stumbled home, thinking about how crazy life is. One minute you’re tripping over cobblestones, and the next you’re celebrating with friends. Baarlo, you’ve got my heart.
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