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About Amsterdam

So, erotic-massage—where do I start? It’s all slippery hands and dim lights, proper cheeky stuff. I’ve seen mortals get all flustered, like, “Oh, is this allowed?” Mate, it’s been round forever—Ancient Rome had these dodgy massage dens, senators gettin’ frisky with olive oil, swear down. Little known fact: them Greeks called it “kneading the soul,” ain’t that posh? Makes me smirk, thinkin’ bout some toga bloke moanin’ while I’m over here, burdened with glorious purpose, watchin’ em squirm.

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But then, the day took a turn. I was walking back, feeling all good about myself, when I saw a group of teenagers hanging out by the bus stop on Pendrechtseweg. They were blasting music, and it was actually kinda catchy. I started bobbing my head, and one of them caught me. They laughed, and I was like, “Yeah, I’m cool too!” But inside, I was dying of embarrassment.

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