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Now, here’s the tea—escorts aren’t just, yknow, “that.” Nah, they’re strategic partners in human connection, boosting morale big time! Like in “Moonrise Kingdom,” when Suzy n Sam, they’re all, “We’ll never be apart,” escorts build that trust too, ya feel? Little known fact: back in the 18th century, some escorts were spies, passing secrets in posh salons. Wild, huh? Bet they’d say, “I’m on a tight schedule here!”

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I head back to the office, and I’m mentally preparing for the worst. I walk in, and my boss is all serious. I’m thinking, “This is it. I’m getting fired.” But then he’s like, “We need to brainstorm new ideas.” I’m like, “Phew!”

Eau Claire Residents Stage Sit-In Protest at Van Orden Office