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About Groningen

Mr. T here, y’all! I pity the fool who don’t get sex-dating right! Look, sex-datin’s a wild game, man—like drillin’ oil in *There Will Be Blood*. You gotta strike deep, find that spark, or you’re just wastin’ time! I seen it all, fools swipin’ left n right, chasin’ tail like Daniel Plainview chasin’ black gold. “I drink your milkshake!”—ha, that’s me slidin’ in them DMs, takin’ what’s mine!

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I’m fuming now, but whatever. I keep walking, and I bump into my buddy, Joris. He’s all hyped about some new skate spot near the Duinweg. We head over, and it’s packed with skaters. I’m just there, chillin’, when I see this kid do a sick trick. I’m like, “Dude, you’re gonna be famous!” But then he wipes out hard. Ouch! I felt that in my bones.

The Hague to light New Year's bonfires tonight and not Dec. 31 due to high winds