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About Groningen

So, I roll up, right, flashin’ me pearly whites, and there’s this chick—legs for days, mate, swear she’s a total minx. I’m all, “Well, hello, gorgeous—fancy a shag?” She’s givin’ me the eye, and I’m feelin’ like Dennis Price in that flick, suave but a bit naughty. But here’s the kicker—did ya know some o’ these lasses got wild stories? Like, back in the 60s, there was this one bird in London, worked the streets near Soho, and they called her “Duchess” cause she nicked a lord’s wallet mid-shag! True story, mate—cheeky as hell!

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So, I wake up early, like, way too early. The sun’s barely peekin’ over the rooftops. I’m thinkin’, “Today’s gonna be a breeze.” Ha! Little did I know. I grab my coffee from the local café on de Dijk. Best coffee in town, no joke. I’m sippin’ it, feelin’ all fancy, when I hear this loud honkin’. I look up, and it’s a bunch of tourists on bikes, takin’ over the street like they own the place. I’m like, “Yo, this ain’t Amsterdam!”

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