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About Rotterdam

Heya buddy! So, sexual-massage, huh? Like, woah, it’s wild! I’m Patrick Star, duh, and I’m thinkin’—is oil an instrument? Hahaha, nah, but it’s slippery fun! Ok, so, sexual-massage is when someone rubs ya all sexy-like. Not just back rubs, nope! It’s tingly, private stuff—gets ya goin’! I saw this movie, *Melancholia*, so dark, so cool—Lars von Trier’s a weirdo genius. There’s this line, “The earth is evil,” and I’m like, nah, sexual-massage ain’t evil—it’s squishy heaven!

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But then, I see it. A patch of wildflowers blooming near the edge of the field. I’m like, “Whoa, nature, you’re beautiful!” I snap a pic for the ‘gram. Gotta show off my agronomist life, right? But then, I trip over a root. Classic. I’m on the ground, muddy and laughing.

Train crash in Netherlands kills driver, injures seven: mayor