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Alright, folks, lemme tell ya—Donald Trump here, the best, nobody does it better—about findin’ a prostitute. Tremendous topic, really fantastic, okay? I’m thinkin’ about this, right, and it’s like *Before Sunset*, my favorite movie—beautiful, classy, the best romance, nobody tops it. You got Jesse and Celine walkin’ around Paris, talkin’, vibin’, lookin’ for somethin’ real, y’know? “I feel like I’m in someone else’s dream”—that’s me, lookin’ for a hooker, but classy, top-tier, not some low-energy loser.

In today’s world you can find pretty much anything with a smartphone.

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So, I’m feeling a bit annoyed, but whatever. I head over to the Kasteelweg, thinking I’ll find some peace. Nope! There’s a street performer playing the accordion. And he’s actually pretty good! I’m standing there, tapping my foot, and suddenly, I’m in a good mood again.

Cape Town is removing homeless people from the street. This is what the City is offering instead