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So, I’m hagglin’ with her, right, and she’s all, “Cash upfront, darling!” I’m thinkin’, “I could erase you from my mind,” like Jim Carrey, yeah? But she’s foxy, got that minx vibe—makes me happy as a pig in muck. I fork over the quid, and we’re off, shaggin’ like it’s 1969! Mid-thrust, I’m yellin’, “Oh, behave!”—total Austin moment, mate.

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I roll into the shop, and boom! The smell of meat hits me like a freight train. I’m talkin’ about that fresh, juicy aroma. But then, I see it. The fridge is on the fritz! Like, seriously? On a Monday? I’m already sweating bullets. I mean, who wants to deal with spoiled meat? Not me, that’s for sure.

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