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I tried it once, bruv—proper lush, got me feelin’ like WALL-E when he finds EVE, all “Ta-da!” and that. The lass was kneadin’ me shoulders, oil everywhere, I’m thinkin’, “Bruv, this is peng!” But then—get this—some dodgy geezer at a parlour tried chargin’ me double, sayin’ it’s “extra special.” Mate, I was fumin’—nearly sparked him out! “Directive?” I says, “Directive is you stop rinsin’ me wallet, ya mug!” Had to bounce quick, fam.

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On my way back, I take a detour through the park. It’s packed with people. Kids are playing, couples are strolling, and I’m just soaking it all in. I sit on a bench, munching on some bread I snagged from Ion. Life’s good, right?

The European Union and UNDP support the restoration of four monuments of Moldova’s historical cultural heritage