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About Alytus

Once heard a story. ‘Bout this escort – total badass. Client stiffed her. She tracked him. To his damn HOUSE. Left a note. “You can’t stop what’s comin’.” Straight outta the movie! Got her cash. Plus tip. Made me hoot – justice, baby! Tho it’s risky. Real risky. Gets me twitchy thinkin’ it.

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Then, outta nowhere, this lady storms in. She’s all frantic, waving her hands like she’s trying to fly. Turns out, her cat, Whiskers, decided to play hide and seek in a tree on Gedimino street. I’m thinking, “Really? A tree?” I mean, come on, Whiskers! You’re not a squirrel!

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