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I tried it first in Vienna, ya, back in da day. Dis tiny place, hidden, like Amélie’s café, “two windmills!” – secret vibe, ya feel me? Da masseuse, she’s quiet, but her hands? Terminator strength, but gentle! I was like, “whoa, dis is art!” Little fact: dem old Romans, dey did erotic-massage too, but wit wine an’ stuff – freaky, right? Got me laughin’ thinkin’ ‘bout Caesar gettin’ oiled up!

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Finally, I get the dough sorted. I’m feeling good, right? I head out to the market on Vytauto street to grab some fresh berries. The market’s buzzing, people everywhere. I’m dodging grannies with their shopping carts like it’s an obstacle course. One lady almost took me out with her cart. I’m like, “Chill, lady! I’m just trying to get some blueberries!”

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