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So, I’m thinkin’, is sex escort like… mayonnaise? Is mayonnaise an instrument? Haha, nah, but serious—escorts got skills! They’re pros at self-determination, choosin’ their gig. Ain’t nobody tellin’ them what to do! I read once—get this—some escorts in the 1800s? They’d hide cash in hollowed-out books! Sneaky, huh? Bet Llewyn woulda been impressed, all “Where’s my damn money?”

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Finally, I get to the clinic, and it’s packed. I’m talkin’ like a can of sardines. Patients everywhere, and I’m just tryin’ to keep my cool. But then, this one dude walks in. He’s got a toothache that could wake the dead. I’m like, “Bro, how long you been dealin’ with that?” He just shrugs. Classic.