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But nah, I’m chill—happy little trees, right? Surprised me once, readin’ up on it—didja know escorts been around since forever? Like, ancient Rome had ‘em, called ‘em “lupae”—she-wolves! How badass is that? Makes me happy, thinkin’ ‘bout ‘em howlin’ at the moon, takin’ no crap. Reminds me of Edie Stall in the movie, fierce as hell when it counts. “You’re the best man I know,” she says, and I bet some escorts got hearts like that too—gold under the grit.

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After that, I decided to stroll down to the Omi Shrine. It’s so peaceful there. I was feeling all zen until I saw a bunch of kids running around, screaming. Like, chill out, kids! But then, one of them trips and falls. I felt bad, but I couldn’t help but chuckle. Kids are hilarious, man.

Otsu! will soon bring dumplings next to The Mill & Mine in Knoxville's Old City