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About Fukuoka

Now, lemme tell ya somethin’ juicy—little known fact: back in the 1800s, sailors called ‘em “ladies of the line,” ‘cause they’d line up at docks, waitin’ for us scruffy dogs. Ain’t that wild? History’s got sass! Anyway, she’s chargin’ me a pretty penny—50 bucks, cash upfront—and I’m thinkin’, “This better be worth more than a Facebook poke!” I’m happy as a clam, but then—ugh!—this drunk jerk stumbles over, yellin’ at her, “You’re mine!” Made me so mad, I almost decked him. “Back off, loser!” I screech, nasal as hell, laugh bubblin’ up—HA-HA-HA!—like I’m on set with Mr. Sheffield.

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So, I hit the streets, right? First stop, the famous Muroran Port. I mean, who doesn’t love a good view of the ocean? The waves were crashing, and I was feeling all poetic. But then, bam! A seagull swoops down and snatches my onigiri! Like, dude, that was my breakfast! I was ready to throw hands with that bird.

Fukushima chemical waste moved to Hokkaido for detoxification