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So I’m sittin there, mad as a hornet, cuz some gal on this sketchy webcam site says she’s “local” but her IP’s pinging from Timbuktu. Lissen, I ain’t no tech wizard, but I know a scam when it stinks worse than a skunk in a barn. Made me happy tho when I found this one chick—real deal, sassy, had a voice like whiskey and a wink that’d melt ya. Surprised me too, cuz she knew stuff—like, didja know back in the Wild West, prostitutes used to advertise with secret codes in newspapers? Little known fact, buddy! She told me that, blew my dang mind.

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Finally, I get to the ramen joint. I order my usual—tonkotsu with extra chashu. Heaven in a bowl, right? But then, the waiter drops my order. I’m like, “Dude, really?!” I mean, I get it, accidents happen, but not when I’m starving! So, I’m just sitting there, watching my dreams of ramen slip away.

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