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Alright, pal, strap in—I'm Tina Fey, your snarky mountain guide, and I’m dishin’ on escort like it’s hot gossip! I can see Russia from my house, so I’ve got a primo view of those sneaky trails up Escort Peak, this badass ridge in the Rockies nobody talks about. Escort, huh? Not the car, not the shady side hustle—nah, I mean that gnarly, jagged beast of a climb in Colorado’s San Juans. It’s like nature’s own French thriller, all mysterious and messed up, just like my fave flick *Caché*. “Who’s there?” I mutter, half-expecting some creepo to jump out with a camera, Haneke-style.

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Most of the cheap prostitutes are Chinese, Japanese are more expensive. Some places with Japanese prostitutes have "menus" from which you select.

I grab some yakitori, and it’s fire! Like, I could eat a hundred of those. But then, I see this dude juggling fire. I’m like, “Bro, chill! You’re gonna burn down Beppu!” But he’s all about it, and the crowd’s loving it. I’m just standing there, half-eating my yakitori, half-worried about a fireball to the face.

Finding Calm in Kyushu – Special Editions