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Still, it ain’t all roses. Gets me fumin’ when blokes lie – “6 foot, fit,” then you rock up and he’s 5’2” with a beer gut. “You’re not gonna die, stop cryin’!” I wanna yell, like Bigelow’s boys. Truth is, sex-dating’s a gamble – half the time you’re chuffed, half the time you’re stuck with a numpty who thinks “foreplay” is a quick grope. Oh, and don’t get me started on the dick pics – unsolicited cock shots everywhere! Bin it, lads, no one’s impressed.

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Then, outta nowhere, this old dude walks in. He’s got this wild hair, like a mad scientist or something. He starts asking me about rare books. I’m thinking, “Dude, this is Amagi, not some fancy Tokyo library.” But he’s super passionate, and I can’t help but get into it. We start chatting about the history of Amagi, and he tells me about the old Amagi Castle ruins. I had no idea! I mean, I’ve lived here forever, and I never even thought to check it out.

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